Lori's thoughts

I just returned from our family’s annual camping trip at Cape Blanco along the Oregon coast. It was our tenth year in a row, but our vacation together turned out differently than I thought it would. We have such great memories there.

All of my sons will be attending high school next year and camping after one week became boring to them. So my husband packed them all up including the two dogs and hauled them back home while I stayed at the campground alone. We were going to have the last week all to ourselves and be able to celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary alone. Sounds good, right? Well, it wasn’t easy for me at first.

While waiting for my husband to return to the campground that day, I tried to get some extra sleep (they all left at 6:00 a.m.), but couldn’t. I was restless and praying for their safety home. I tried to keep busy by putting extra sleeping bags away, camping chairs and other items around the campsite, but found myself anxious. I was going to ride my bike, but was overwhelmed with sadness. I took a long walk on the beach, but became extremely lonely. Believe it or not, there was no one else on the beach that day.

I began to have thoughts about what would I do if all of my family were taken from me suddenly and I was left by myself? How would I handle it? Could I handle it? What would I do? During this time, I kept my thoughts on God, trying to figure out why I was feeling this way as tears filled my eyes. I tried to sing praise songs to fill the void and gain some comfort.

There’s no way for me to prepare for a possible tragic event. No one can. I feared that my faith would not be strong enough or I would turn from God instead of to Him. Would I pass the test? I really don’t know. I do know I have a better chance with God than without Him. I don’t know how people survive their tragic events without Him.

“Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” Psalm 42:5-6a

By the way, everyone made it home safely and my husband returned to the campsite that afternoon. After the first day of mourning our unexpected “loss”, we had a great rest of the week. However, it wasn’t quite the same without the boys and dogs, but definitely less hassle!